Goodbye Facebook

Goodbye Facebook

My high school friends told me about Facebook. Since all of them had an account, I decided to create one myself although I was very nonchalant about my account. I had never displayed my pictures on social sites and told myself that I would not display my pictures on Facebook. But then everybody I knew had their pictures on. So, I started uploading pictures, and before I knew it, I had a million pictures of mine there.

What happened next was that brothers I knew started adding me. I was reluctant in the beginning, but a voice inside me told me to grow up and that it was no big deal. The first comment I got was from a brother I studied with – “Nice picture, Maryam.”  What did he mean by that? I asked myself. Was he being chummy? Honestly speaking, I felt so bad when he wrote that comment on my wall, but then a voice inside my heart told me not to overreact and to show some manners so I thanked him.

I don’t know what happened next, but I started following the dunya. The values I stood up for and walked with became obsolete to me. My compromises turned into huge sacrifices. I became so desensitized and immune to the haram that was happening. I forgot that there was a God out there watching me, and I forgot that I was supposed to emulate the best of mankind- RasulAllah salla Allahu ‘alayhi wasallam. Random people would message me asking me for friend requests; they said I was “pretty” and they wanted to be friends with me. I even got some proposals on Facebook- can you believe it! And there were lists of stalkers who kept sending me stupid messages and songs on YouTube through fake accounts in my inbox.

Later, when I had pulled back a bit from Facebook, I stopped interacting with a lot of brothers there because a verse from the Quran kept spinning in my head:

I did not create the jinn and mankind except to worship Me. [51:56]

When I woke up from my stupor, I realized that I had become some other Maryam I never wanted to be. I had so many friends, but I was never happy because none of them reminded me of Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala. None of them ever told me that displaying my pictures like that or chatting with random people was wrong and against the sunnah. Shaytan loves spreading promiscuity and hates modesty, and somehow I had chosen to follow him instead of following Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala.

Prophet Muhammed salla Allahu alayhi wasallam said:

Modesty is part of faith and faith is in paradise, but obscenity is part of hardness of heart and hardness of heart is in hell. (Ahmad, Tirmidhi)

I had faith, and I was a monotheist. But where was my hayaa, and where were my priorities? I had become a slave of my desires. Islam came to guide man, and here I was in the shackles of my own desires, other people, and the media. Allah, subhanahu wa ta’ala, has said:

“Have you seen him who takes his own lust (vain desires) as his ilah (god)?” [45:23]

In light of this verse, Imam Al-Ghazali said:

“Those who follow their own passions do not conform to monotheism, because anyone who follows his own passions makes them the object of his worship. The monotheist is he who sees nothing but the One God and only turns his face to Him.”

I removed all my pictures and changed the privacy settings of my account, but I still felt that my soul was filthy. My heart was hard. Even the Quran failed to penetrate my heart and didn’t make me cry anymore. I had everything I wanted, but something inside me was dying. It was my Iman. My Iman was suffocating.

I realized that the only way to purify my nafs was to leave things that distracted me. True, Facebook had its advantages, but for me, it was like alcohol; its detriment was greater than its benefit. So I decided to give it up for the sake of Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala. For months I struggled with my decision. It was hard saying goodbye to everyone, but I told them that I would be available by email if they needed me, and I requested them to remove, crop, or blur my pictures from Facebook because a voice inside me said, Maryam your face is precious and only for your hubby to see. Yes, I struggled, and it was hard: I gave up so many things which I feared would not benefit me in the Hereafter. I am still in the process of purifying my heart and always will be inshaAllah because it’s a lifelong struggle. Sometimes, things we do seem good to us, but they slowly poison our Iman.

Sheikh Reda Bedier said: “Watch the little things; a small leak will sink a great ship.”

You see, sometimes, we have our feet in two separate boats, one which has the flag of our desires on it and the other which says, “I love you, Allah, subhanahu wa ta’ala.” It’s sad how we juggle between what’s necessary and what’s not and prefer what our heart desires over what our Khaliq wants us to do. Ustaad Khurram Murad said:

“Your Qalb (heart) cannot be compartmentalized. You cannot dedicate one piece of it to Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala and another to some other god, like wealth, status, career, spouse and so on. Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala is One, Indivisible and wants the human being to be undivided in service to Him. So long as our heart lies in a hundred places, so long as our eyes are set in a hundred directions, so long as we have many loyalties, we shall never be able to achieve that condition of ‘holding onto Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala’.”

Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala has said:

“O you who believe! Enter into Islam whole heartedly without any reservation.” [2: 208]

I want you to know, that if I can do it, then you can too. If you have anything in your heart that perturbs you greatly and it gives you sleepless nights, ask yourself one question: “Am I prepared for my death, my akhirah?” Truth is, nothing in life is guaranteed but death. After deleting my Facebook account and saying goodbye to it for good inshaAllah, I have so much faith in Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala that He will give me a better platform to do dawah, one that will not distract me inshaAllah.

I pray that each and every one of us succeeds in becoming a believing, steadfast servant for Allah’s sake. May Allah, subhanahu wa ta’ala, enable us to be amongst those who purify themselves and help us differentiate between right and wrong, Ameen.

Source: I got it covered

42 Comments

  • Arooj

    MashaAllah, thats very good. Many people nowadays are following the whisperings of Shaytan. May Allah swt guide all muslims, Ameen.

  • Arshad Hussain

    I am impressed by this article and experince of this person who has taken initiative to guide others not to follow this path (addiction to face book). The other day I read in a Daily Newspaper that face book has become the most common reason for divorce among couples in UK. Millions of people are mislead and getting trapped into this facebook addiction, right from a 10 year old to even 60 year old. The article says so nicely (the facebook had its advantages, but it is like alcohol, its deteriment is greater than its benefit). Well, I am passing on this article to many of my muslim brothers and sisters and parents of teenagers and wish I can influence them so to stay away from addiction called face book. May Allah guide us to the right path. Please keep us posted us with more and more Islamic way of life and concerns of day to day life of youth and family issues. Thank you. Allah Hafiz.

  • faizal

    Summa ameen. After reading this aticle, i removed my FB account.
    Thanks for the article.

  • um

    absolutly beautiful artical. something i will deffo share. can tell she had a sincere objective when writing this as it really hits the heart.

  • Souraya

    Wow that really hit me hard. Everything that was said is true, we are 4gettin our duty to Allah most gracious n takin our friends as priority over our Lord. I too have fallen into this trap of postin my pics n feelin smug with myself when I receive a compliment, why? I see a majority of my facebook friends doin it n feel compelled to follow. Thank you sister for postin this u have opened my eyes n to many others also. Please pray 4 me that Allah most merciful forgives me 4 my foolishness n 2 guide me n help me to guide others away from the vices that are corrupting our deen Islam.

  • boss

    Irony: My friend posted this article on facebook.

    Different things work for different people. If you can resist the temptation to add immodest pictures, add unnecessary people, flirt, etc, then no problem. If you need to get off facebook in order to stay straight though, then do what you gotta do…

  • anonymous

    MASHALLAH….hope everyone learns something from it…. 🙂

  • sakinah

    thank u.it stabs me right in the heart.insyaAllah ive been thinking of doing so

  • fatimah

    Mashaallah…….. i am on face book but i keep on deactivating n then going back on again..deep dwn in my heart i know that it is wrong.just yesterday i came across a hadith which says:
    “the halal is clear and the haram is clear and inbetween them are ambivalent matters which many people do not know.whoever guards himself against ambivalent matters has secured his deen and his honour.whoever falls into ambivalent matters will fall into the haram,like the sheperd who sheperds (his flock)around forbidden pasturage, he is certain to pasture(his flock)in it.certainly, every king has his forbidden pasturage.certainly, Allahs pasturage is the things he has forbidden…(al-bukhari)
    LETS HEED THE ADVICE OF THE SISTER N ABOVE ALL THE ADVICE OF THE PROPHET MUHD(SAW) N THE QURAN WHICH SAYS IN CHAPTER49V13″ THE NOBLEST AMONGST U IN ALLAHS SIGHT IS THE ONE WITH THE MOST TAQWA”
    MAY ALLAH MAKE IT EASY FOR US ALL,AMIN.

  • dufle

    Great advice, we all know that facebook is a book of satan.

  • Saeed

    The eyes open, the fog before them fades away and you begin to see clearly. The pleasures of the dunya are distracting you from the fact they are really a weight hanging from your neck which will send you to the hellfire.

  • jj

    i agree…social websites are not like they use to be in the past. now you have alot of bad people in these sites. your true friends will keep in touch with you through emails but nosey people who have nothing going on in their lives only go to these places like facebook, myspace. tagged and so forth.
    ALWAYS KEEP YOUR IMAN IN ALLAH AND YOU WILL SUCEED IN EVERYTHING..INSHA ALLAH…

  • IamAMuslim

    Asalamu Alaikum..

    I am 13 years old Muslim and I have 4 FB accounts, I promise that aftering this article I will delete them all..
    It makes me busy to open and log-outs my accounts, and sometimes its the reason that I can’t pray. Thank You for sharing this.
    I know that using Facebook will lead me to nothing. Thank You and May Allah Guide and Protect us all.. Ameen.

  • safiyya

    maasha allah whatever the person said in the above article is 100% true. each and every muslim should take that above naseehath as a gud namoona to our life insha allah may allah keep us much more far away from shaithan
    ( FACEBOOK) AAMEEN

  • safiyya

    GUD BYE SHAITHAN( FACEBOOK)

  • z_o

    I have really liked your article sister facebook really
    Is a addiction and its making manu muslim brothers and sisters
    Play with their heads facebook is usually a new beginning for young teenage girls and boys
    To start off with bad deeds and it carrys on.May ALLAH protect everyone from bad doings
    And guide us all to the right part AMEEN.

  • Nouman

    I really like your article .
    May ALLAh ! Keep muslim away from Facebook ( Ameen)

  • Nazreen

    Hi there,

    It’s a nice post…

    It definitely motivates all of us… 🙂

    May Allah’s blessings be always with us….

  • Maryum

    I have not thought on lines of giving up on facebook. But it’s true, being a believer in Allah, being a musalmaan that sakoon and the peace from my heart and qalb is missing. It is true that my soul is dying. My heart has hardened towards the right things. I keep on waiting for an instance that this will all change. That I will suddenly become a devout, good musalmaan. Mohsin of Allah. I believe this is my dilemma. I dont make any effort on my own.
    Having said that I am very happy to see the thoughts of the writer, MashAllah. This the integrity of faith we need, the devotion to our Allah.
    May Allah guide us all to the path of the righteous. Ameen.

  • kapil

    true, thnax sis

    now i will defiantly delete my account and focus on my studies

    seriously facebook was eating my dream
    my future
    my career
    now em feeling a unique type of peace and calm after reading this amazing artical

    jai shree ram

  • Assalam-o-alaikum dear friends,

    This is an eye opener for me and Insha’Allah for all of my friends and their friends who may get this through sharing on their wall. This story is about FaceBook but each one of us can apply to many unique aspects of our life where we feel trapped into worldly lust …. such as
    – Posting unethical material such as in-appropriate pictures, videos etc.
    – Not offering our FARZ namaz
    – Listening, watching which is not permissible and sharing the same with others which will add up
    – Earn halal is Eibadat but wasting rest of time in idle and not gaining reward for life hereafter such as Zikr, Durood, Reading Quran, Ahadees and other books for character building and sharing the same knowledge with others !!!!!

    I request all my friends to read this story and think of applying the theme to different aspects of our lives. If one is not seeing FB as a challenge and choose to use as forum then please consider:

    – Keep a separate account for your family and keep only close family members on that account so that so can comfortably share your precious family pictures and videos safely within your family.
    – On the forum of your friends, prefer to keep your friendship circle that help you to guide this life which can turn into blessed life hereafter. One keep friendship limited known friends of same gender as in many cases guys have made accounts with beautiful girl pictures to add to your challenges to keep on the path of guidance of Allah Almighty and Beloved Rasoolullah (Peace and Blessings Be Upon Him).

    – Refrain from posting in-appropriate material on your wall which in first muslim should not be watching himself and then sharing will turn into continuous sin !!!!!

    May Allah Almighty guide us all for the sake of Beloved Rasoolullah (Peace and Blessings Be Upon Him) so that we live this life with care and do not trap ourselves in sins !!!! Ameen

    Jazak’Allah-Ho-Khaira

    Zia

    PS: Please visit a website given below where you will a great book (Hidayat-ul-Ummah) which is an excellent compilation of Quranic Verses and Ahadees-e-Mubaraka on various topic for our guidance such as Love of Allah Almighty, Love of Beloved Rasoolullah (Peace and Blessings Be Upon Him), Importance of Zikr etc.
    http://www.ivision4mm.wordpress.com

  • Masha Allah! This is really thought provoking.
    May Allah reward you. Aameen.
    Whatever you leave for the sake of Allah, Allah will replace it with something good, even better for you Insha Allah.
    Really inspired.
    Alhamdulillah!

  • jabir

    asalamu alaikm… This article touched my heart…i have never read any article like this before. Really i was so addicted in nimbz chatng n photo sharing.. especially with girls.. But after reading this article..i deleted all females contacts from my nimbz id eventhough it was very hard to delete the contacts..but i did it thinking allah…nowadays, our(muslims) status is like “we were born into a muslim family..but never was a muimin.. ” ..so sacrifice for allah.. He is almighty..he will help us.. read the quran understanding it’s meaning… Include me in all your prayers who read this article and see my comment..may allah bless US.

  • Mustafa

    That’s life sister.one have to fight against his/her body desires for the good of his/her nafs.indeed,earthly life has an end and the body is to rote but not your soul.say no nonses to your body,comand it and force it to do the best it can for the good of your nafs.shiatwin wishes to lead us astray day and night,privately or in public but it’s upto our body to resist from bad desires.i like you quiting fb because it’s one of satan’s means to make use of us.mind you,satan can b in any form.man,boy,girl,woman,wife,husband,child,wealth,health etc.all that against man-kind.how i use fb is by it’s privacy settings.no one can send me a friend request,message or post on my wall only if that person is my friend and my fb friends are my blood relatives,brothers/sisters for the seek of easing the communication line between us since we stay a distant but though,non o thir friends can see my pictures:-)¿???because i post not my pictures .hey,this’ out for all of us.all in all,you did the best thing sister.you did the right thing by quiting be4 it had worsen.all da best sister Mariam.ma’saalam

  • Nyla

    Salaam brothers and sisters

    Masha Allah it is brilliant that by the grace of Allah this sister has woken up to the satanic fb addiction that many Muslim youth have fallen victim to.

    fb has been created by the kuffar to pry into peoples lives, it is funded by the CIA who have saved millions of pounds because stupid fb users display there whole lives on fb. People detail who they are, where they live, who there family is, where they are or are going to be and they also have photos to back all this up. The kuffar collate this info and keep it indefinitely to use at a later date. Previously it took months for organisations like the cia/fbi/mossad and co to gather this much info. They sit and laugh at people because you walk straight into their trap.

    Wake up Muslims we are living in the end times. Joining fb is inviting shaitaan into your life, don’t walk into his trap.

    Here is a link to an interesting article:
    http://adventofdeception.com/facebook-ciacover-nwo-agenda/

    May you all be guided by the light of Islam. Peace.

  • Imtiaz Qureshi

    Curiosity is a weakness of humans. The fact that you can have friends of the opposite sex in your list, with their shameless photographs is enough to make facebook detestable.

    Wabisah bin Ma’bad (r.a.) reported:
    I went to the Messenger of Allah and he asked me “ Have you come to inquire about piety?” I (Wabisah bin Ma’bad (r.a.) )replied in the affirmative.

    Then he (Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, “ Ask your heart regarding it. Piety is that which contents the soul and comforts the heart and sin is that which causes doubts and perturbs (to disturb greatly) the heart, even if people pronounce it lawful and gives you verdicts on such matters again and again.”

    After reading it I forwarded this article to several of my brothers/sisters in Islam. I myself was always against facebook, because of people portraying what they are actually not in real life.

    A pure heart is one that is full of the love of Allah. It is a heart that naturally fears and loathes falling into sin and even the possibility of falling into sin.

    May peace and the blessings of Allah(s.w.t) be upon us.

    Allahu Al’am

  • Elmi Abdirahman

    SUBXANALAAH after when i read, this topic walahi my mind heart wants to stop using this evil site facebook,,, i was felt into tears brothers and sister pls dua for me to try and stop using this fake social site, it distructs families and even makes friedns into enemies your ducaaa pls love u brothers and sister in islam

  • Yasin Azad

    SUBXANALAAH after when i read, this topic walahi my mind heart wants to stop using this evil site facebook,,, i was felt into tears brothers and sister pls dua for me to try and stop using this fake social site, it distructs families and even makes friedns into enemies your ducaaa pls love u brothers and sister in islam

  • Shahid Anwar

    Sub—- Facebook
    This is Shahid from Kanpur
    This message is to all MUSLIM UMMAH AND TO MY MUSLIM SISTERS.

    In Islam, Women are not allowed to show their face to the world.
    How can somebody prayer be answered when he or she is earning ALLAH ANGER by showing herself to the world.
    We think sometimes that why we are not getting ALLAH HELP AS SOME BODY IS ALWAYS SICK OR UNHAPPY FAMILY LIFE .
    THIS IS BECAUSE CONSTANTLY HE OR SHE MAKING ALLAH AND HIS MESSENGER ANGRY KNOWINGLY OR UNKNOWINGLY
    Some women have a good excuse saying that my account cannot be accessed or blocked but those people and their friends are always seeing you who are in the friend list and some of them are them or most of them are GAIRMEHRAM.
    No matter , even they are school friends, they will also be in the list of GAIRMEHRAM.

    How foolish we are that we have been trapped in SATAN plan and we are helping SATAN to flourish their work.

    When we help Satan, how can ALLAH help us.

    This is not the platform to talk about DEEN AS I SAW A COMMENT LIKE HAVE FAITH IN FAITHBOOK NOT FACEBOOK>

    BE DEENI SE DEEN NAHI PHALATA>

    ATLEAST AS A MUSLIM WE CAN DO IS REMOVE OUR PHOTOGRAPHS IF NOT SCRAP OUR ACCOUNT FROM FACEBOOK>

    IF WE DONT DO THIS . IT MEANS WE HAVE NO FEAR OF ALLAH.

  • Anonymous

    Jazzak Allah Khair Sister,this post was exactly what I needed! I have a similar story like yours, although I did not go too far due to my cautious/ reserved nature. It’s funny b/c I could not deactivate my fb account, it wouldn’t let me. FB kept on making changes and messing peoples accounts. This is what’s happening now. I applaud you for your self reflection, and courage to do that. After we take the right path,it’s not easy, I put a pic of religion as my fb pic, got few likes, I was worrying if people thought I was becoming extreme, but I wasn’t. You see, this is what fb does to you. It’s like people’s opinions and how you appear out there matter more,I had enough and switched to twitter, which isn’t as bad.Facebook seems to cause little problems like little sleep in the youth, ego-driven hopes,etc.,but if not modified, can totally change the person’s outlook and values in life.

  • jazakallah sister. I’m of 17..
    overally, I’ve deleted about 5-6 a/c’s of fb.
    but the difference was, this happened before checking out this article.

    par m phir wahi galati dohrane ja raha tha..
    tabhi Maine Google pe search kiya – (is fb halal or haram in Islam);
    & I got this article..
    & for wat bcause of dis article, 2day I’ve avoid signing up on fb..

    brothers & sisters, let me know if anything is going same wid other social networking services like twitter, instagram, etc.
    meet this site soon!

  • Abdulrahim

    Mashallah i am amazed by your strenght of your iman.

    I did the same thing, i deleted my facebook right after i have readen this, i have though about it alot, and im glad that i did it, becaus i felt like it was standing on my way, like a wall and it had more draw back then benefit.

  • Farah

    Jazak Allah Khair Maryam, and for all those amazing comments….my heart was so confused and perturbed. These are the words that gave me the final push I desperately needed:

    “Watch the little things; a small leak will sink a great ship.”

    If you have anything in your heart that perturbs you greatly and it gives you sleepless nights, ask yourself one question: “Am I prepared for my death, my akhirah?”

    ‘The halal is clear and the haram is clear and in between them are ambivalent matters which many people do not know. Whoever guards himself against ambivalent matters has gone to the utmost limit in seeking to be clear in his din and his honour. Whoever falls into ambivalent matters will fall into the haram, like the shepard who shepards [his flock] around forbidden pasturage, he is certain to pasture [his flock] in it. Surely, every king has his forbidden pasturage. Surely, Allah’s forbidden pasturage is the things He has forbidden. Surely, in the body there is a lump of flesh which when it is sound the whole body is sound and when it is corrupt the whole body is corrupt. Truly, it is the heart.’ ”

    Al-Bukhari and Muslim narrated it.

    Wabisah bin Ma’bad (r.a.) reported:
    I went to the Messenger of Allah and he asked me “ Have you come to inquire about piety?” I (Wabisah bin Ma’bad (r.a.) )replied in the affirmative.

    Then he (Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, “ Ask your heart regarding it. Piety is that which contents the soul and comforts the heart and sin is that which causes doubts and perturbs (to disturb greatly) the heart, even if people pronounce it lawful and gives you verdicts on such matters again and again.”

    “I have so much faith in Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala that He will give me a better platform to do dawah, one that will not distract me inshaAllah.”

    Jazahum Allah Khair

  • Latip Abs (Qurtubi)

    Assalamu alaykum brothers and sister mashaallah its make surprize when I see and read this article .it really makes me happy that there are some website like this which is make our iman strong. Ameen

  • Bilal

    Assalamualaikum,

    May Allah immensely reward the sister for her sincere effort. You see, how Allah responded to your sincere intentions. He has already given you an alternate platform for dawah. This article of yours is still making an impact even on August 28th 2014.

    I was suffering from FB as well and now I have enough motivation to delete it.

    The fact that so many people are replying positively to your article is a testimony to your sincerity.

    May Allah give you more strength and imaan and may Allah keep us all steadfast and away from the traps of Shaitaan and our nafs. Ameen!

  • Irshaad M

    I closed my facebook account 5 months ago because of this. Today, as I was about to activate my facebook account again, I came across this article. Thanks for reminding me of all the bad things that happens on social websites… May Allah guide us to the right path and keep us strong against the whisperings of Shaytaan.

  • Shafa

    same story as mine… Thanx for d reminder.. Masha allh

  • imran

    Allah is great

  • Abdullah

    Assalamu alaikum,

    Nice article, really points to the reality. This article is like someone put my thoughts or desires into beautiful words. Please stop worrying about facebook and start worrying about factbook ( our Amaal Naama, the book of deeds).

    I am usually gets very busy, but I think it will be good idea if some people can start whatsapp groups like ‘bye-bye facebook’ or ‘go facebook go’ something in these lines.

    MaAssalama

  • ameerah

    Yes sister ma sha allah I have not completed deleted fb yet but been thinking about it. I have an all sisters page. no brothers and you should seen how many are upset. They pretend they are giving dawah but loling and chatting with non mahram men and women and if this is on your fb you will be held for it too. I have taken all my photos down and only add sisters, and stay clear as their are a lot who are fitnah makes and will assume you think you are better than them. Ive even had muslim men and women make threats to me for wanting to change. anyway thank you for this post. Its really hit home.

  • JazakAllahu khair sister in Islam for sharing your wonderful lessons learned. May Allah the Almighty accept all our good deeds, forgive all our sins and guide us to doing only that which pleases Him. Ameen.

    May Allah the Most Merciful bless the Muslim Ummah and rectify our affairs too. Ameen.

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